7 rules from a profitable pub in North London

1. Understand what you’re selling

People are NOT really buying the beer in the glass.

They’re buying a few precious hours when they feel “everything is taken care of”.

A good pub is an escape where customers don't have to worry about anything.

And you give people this sense by subtly implying that the space is being actively managed.

Have staff regularly wander around the whole pub, quietly enforcing your patrons' right to have a lovely time.

Some examples of how this looks:

1. A quick lap of the beer garden just to check everything is cool - notice there’s an obnoxious group of dickheads disturbing everyone - a friendly tap on the shoulder to tell them to bring it down a little. Most people simply aren’t aware they’re being so loud after a few drinks.

2. Hourly bathroom checks, soap and paper replenished, with a visible checklist on the door that’s signed by staff. Bad pubs make people stand in puddles of piss and wonder why they don’t have customers beating a path to their door. Boggles the mind.

It's not flashy stuff - but getting these basics of the customer experience right is so important.

The profit is made in the lifetime value of the customer - and them bringing their friends next week, next month and next year

For that to happen, you need to be genuinely recommendable.

You’re asking people to stake their reputation on telling people about you, so you need to make them feel safe to do so by delivering a spotless experience.

2. Charge slightly more than you feel comfortable with

Two reasons:

Easier life

If you compete on price with your neighbours you will be dealing with a different type of customer.

The price point you set attracts the corresponding demographic.

By NO MEANS is everyone who goes to a more rugged pub an issue. I’ve had some of the best nights of my life on 2 quid pints of Carling.

But the density of trouble-makers coming from bargain basement boozers is much higher than average - too many of these will drive away the customers you want (respectful, chilled, with disposable income).

Actually be profitable

The margins in hospitality are not amazing so don’t make things harder for yourself.

Offer a premium experience, and charge a premium price.

Take a gin and tonic for example.

You can shove out a sad-looking, garnish-less G&T and ask for a fiver.

Or you can put it in a showy glass, with plenty of ice, a sprig of mint and a couple of straws for 8 quid.

An extra 30 seconds to prepare, and a handful of pence for the accoutrements.

For a HUGE impact on your margins.

“But won’t people feel ripped off”

Again, people care more about the experience and how they feel at the pub than the liquid in the glass.

So don’t leave money on the table with low-effort slop. Give people something worth paying for and they’ll thank you for it.

3. ‘Upsells’ should be natural - never intrusive

An example of this would be staff periodically orbiting the space, casually picking up “remote” orders as they go.

You’re not soliciting - but as you’re walking by, you’re easy to flag down for another round.

This is how you ‘upsell’ in a way that doesn’t shatter the customers’ ‘safe haven’ - because you’re not bloody intruding on their conversation.

A lame way to upsell is to push shots on people when they’re ordering or try and guide them towards a double over a single.

People can sense that - they feel you pulling them off the track of what they came to the bar for.

You do not need to squeeze people. Just allow them to spend as much money as they want to - and trust they’ll come back with friends (because no one else locally is making them feel as safe/at ease as you are).

4. You Want People to Stay

All you have to do is look around and think about how you’d be comfortable chilling at home if you had guests over.

• You’d want it to be clean

• You’d want to offer them a drink without looking like you’d rather be anywhere else

• You’d probably have some decent lighting and laidback music

Have some empathy with the customer. How would I like to be looked after?

Then, you need to deliver on that every day to provide a consistent experience. Your locals must be able to rely on you.

For example - there is nothing less welcoming than when someone starts mopping or putting chairs up as people are enjoying a drink YOU OFFERED THEM at last call.

But inevitably, some staff will want to get home and will start doing little bits and pieces of “close” ahead of time to have a headstart.

In so doing, you start training your customers that their window for a comfortable drink changes depending on who is on shift.

And accordingly, you lose all the late-night local traffic that may have dropped in for a ‘crafty one’.

Because they can no longer trust that they’re always going to get the full experience they’re paying a premium price for 

These little leaks really stack up over time and make the difference between a struggling bar and a blisteringly profitable one.

5. But know how to get people to leave

With that said, you will get stragglers who have drank too much and don’t know when to call it a night, nursing a pint an hour after last call.

They do, regrettably, need to go at some point: 

• Turn on the harsher overhead light

• Open the doors if it’s winter (freeze them out)

• Don’t be afraid to give them a polite “been great to have you chaps, but I’ve got to let my staff go home. If you could finish up, we’ll see ya at the weekend”

People will inevitably ask you to make exceptions, and inquire as to ‘when the lock-in is happening’. You need to be very careful here.

If you start playing favourites, you risk alienating some of your regulars. Any lock-ins should be arranged discretely and (in my view) infrequently.

6. Drinking on the job

Some people just want a job where they can get drunk every day.

I’ve heard the arguments about drinking on shift adding to the ‘fun’ atmosphere of a place.

But to me, that’s a non-starter. People aren’t coming for your tipsy bartenders - they’re coming to spend time with their friends.

And you’re going to do a much better job of facilitating that primary aim with sober staff.

You need to be alive happening in the space, making sure you’ve got backup stock on hand, and making sure the bathrooms are regularly checked and replenished.

When you’re tipsy, you start getting lax on all these little things. Which is NOT GOOD, because these are the battles you need to win to be differentiated from the other watering holes.

In my experience, avoid any interviewees who push back even slightly about working sober.

Daily drinkers are usually unreliable, and too often arrive late to work (and sometimes not at all).

This is usually due to a genuine emergency - but these emergencies are frequent because their lives are in utter disarray.

7. Be alive to situations and get in front of them

You should have a general awareness of who’s in the building, and what they’re up to.

A straggler has just wandered in wearing a football shirt on matchday. Clearly a fan.

Except the game has already been on 10 minutes - which means he’s possibly just been booted out from the place next door. Noted.

Those lads who have knocked back 3 beers each in the last hours now seem to be going to the bathroom in pairs. Curious. 

If you’re not paying attention, you won’t catch these situations until they’ve thoroughly pissed off your good customers, and you’re being offered a fight in the beer garden.

Anything that can go wrong invariably does. You need to go around the pub before a shift like a fighter pilot checking his plane before takeoff.

Do we have enough of everything (beer, glassware, straws, a million other things)?

You should have backups of everything as close to hand as possible. The last thing you want is to be shuttling up and down the cellar in the middle of a rush.

7.5 My biggest (personal) bugbear.

The bottom half of the glass is for you, the top half is for the the customer

The customer's mouth is going to go on top of the glass. Do not hand them their drink with your fingers on the rim.

(You may be surprised that this is not intuitive for some people - but it is NOT intuitive for many. New staff are used to making drinks for themselves, not paying customers).